When Rich Ely speaks, you'd best take off them earmuffs.Editor's Note: The Chumley awards will be handed out tomorrow. In the meantime, I'd like to pull back the curtain on a brand new featurette here on ALSAP!!, entitled Phitin' Phillies Phlayoff Phever! Since I know nothing about the MLB as an entity, but enjoy the sucess of the local squad, I thought we should cover this topic, yet deemed myself incapable. So, pinch hitting for me on this column is our resident baseball guru and Phils fan, Rich Ely. His words are as follows. This featurette will continue only as long as the Phillies do; so please root, root, root for the home team. If they don't win...well I kind of figured they wouldn't.
Take it away, Rich!
E-A-G-L-E-S- Phillies?!?!
You heard it right, pee faces. April is finally here and that means its time to kick of a brand spanking new season of America’s favorite pastime… what? It’s not April? What? Baseball isn’t America’s favorite pastime? In fact, it ranks somewhere between Seinfeld re-runs and Dangling Ding Dongs on the Delaware shores? Really, you say?
Our beloved city, best known for its cheesy meats (no, I’m not making fun of any of the league member’s members) and year-after-year *insert sport here* underperformances has finally brought October baseball back, in dramatic fashion. 2007 - the season that has all the championship-ly challenged Phanatics in Philly asking each other, “Have you seen my baseball?” - has the potential to bring the city more baseball wins than football wins in October. It’s like something that tastes bitter and sweet in your mouth at the same time. Yummy.
Well, enough is enough. Moyer isn’t getting any younger. Lets move on to a game 1 preview.
WEDNESDAY, 3 PM, CITIZENS BANK PARK:
Matchup: Jeff Francis (LHP, 4.22 ERA) vs. Cole Hamels (LHP, 3.39 ERA)
Analysis: Yes, the Rockies have been the hottest in the majors, and although Francis leads the team in wins, his was anything but hot in his last 6 outings recording 3 losses and posting a 5.38 ERA. In his last start against the Phils in mid-September, he lasted only 3.1 innings and yielded 8 runs on 8 hits. Hamels, on the other hand, is one of the League’s premier southpaws and boasts a changeup that would break most of our manly backs. He spent some time on the DL during the end of August and beginning of September, but he looks as strong as ever, winning his last start in the crucial final days of the season while recording 13 K’s. Rollins, Utley, Howard, and Rowand match up pretty evenly with Matsui, Tulowitzki, Holliday, and Helton at this point in the season. We all know these teams can hit… so it’s going to come down to pitching in this one – and the Rockies used 10 of their hurlers on Monday night.
Unlike Peavy, Hamels will baffle Colorado’s lineup and tap the Rockies with an avalanche-mix of pitch speeds. Myers puts runners on in the 9th, but ultimately the extra rest pays off, and the Phils put a frost-brewed liner on the Rockies hot streak. Does anyone else feel like enjoying a cheap beer right now?
Final Score: Phils 5, Rocks 3.
6 comments:
I propose a ban on the consumption of Coors Light until the Rockies are discarded from the playoffs by the Phils.
If the Rockies win the series, I call for the ban to henceforth become a Pete Rose Lifetime Ban.
All in favor?
Coors Light blows anyway.
Rockies in 5.
Great work, Richie!
You know, there are times that I really enjoy living on West Coast time. I get to watch Monday Night Football in its entirety and STILL have time to watch The Hills at a decent hour. The weekend's games start in the morning and leave me plenty of time to lay on the couch in the afternoon to scratch my belly, without feeling like I wasted an entire day -- I got up at 7:30am to watch football, after all!
But having the Phils' game start at noon Wednesday out here? How brutal. Sadistic. Nothing will get done. Particularly because I'll also be thinking about being at the Dbacks/Cubs game later that night. Watch for me boys, I'll be along third base in the third row. If you see a 26-year-old man clock a youngster in the face with nachos in the pursuit of a foul ball, that's most likely me.
GO PHILS!
Third row? Nice.
My strategy:
Come into work at 6:00, work until 2:30, home by 3:15, nude by 3:18, covered head to toe in ranch dressing by 3:24, drunk by 3:47, fire trucks arrive by 5:03, Phils win by 6:12, celebrating by 6:13.
At least that's how I hope it goes.
what I meant to say was:
Phils 2, Rocks 4.
Wow, look at that!
Disappointed, but more to come...
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