A-Rep's Week 5 Crystal Ball

Aaron looks into the future with the help of Saruman The White.

Editor's Note: It appears that the Games of The Week feature is back! Aaron will be tackling this weekend's top matchups to see who's got a leg up. Enjoy.

GAMES TO WATCH!!!!

Runner up…Hawaii McLovin at MichaelPJackson
Why this game do you ask? Well, I looked at this and thought…OH…INTENSE BROTHER RIVALRY…
And then I thought some more about how their pregame conversations might sound…
“oh brother! Let me tell you again how funny your team name is!!!”
“oh brother! You’re too kind! ‘tis your team name that is funniest of all the names in the land!!”
“you’re the best! I can’t stand the thought of beating you this week! :-(”
“GUESS WHAT!!!! I was thinking the same thing! OMG! We think so much alike!!!! I can’t stand the thought of beating you!!!””
“Giggle! Let’s bench our entire teams so that we tie!!”
“you are as smart as you are cute brother. I agree! TIE WE WILL!”

This brings me to my pick for GAME of the WEEK…
Kinda of obvious but…KIM JONG AT GRYLLS
This game is a pivotal game for control of division supremacy and the all important race to clinch a coveted playoff spot. Let’s delve slightly…
Let’s face it…there is a nasty dog fight goin’ on in the evil kingdom of the decepticons. Hefty needs this win to stay atop of the pack. Especially for reign of the A.P.T.S.!!! And it’s pretty much a given that I am gonna beat craig this week. Jordan needs this win. If me and hefty come out this week with W’s…the APTS gain immunity from being kicked off the island and also get a free pass to tell more inside jokes through the blog.

Important Side note:
Pay close attention to the Junk Jabber at Fritzs game. Besides the fact that Larry Craig’s under the stall foot rubbing might get him lucky against the jabber boyz, the fritzs also have a tough 1-3 record due to some tough matchups. I think we all have the feeling that the Quad D’s and the Holiday teddy bears don’t have a shot at the playoffs…but if the fritz’s fall to 1-4, it’ll be an awfully tough climb back into the playoff race.

Monday Morning Slobbering Yap: 9/3/07

Matthew Paul could spring an upset in Week 1 -- so long as he doesn't eat himself to death.

5 Things I Think That I Thought Were (9/3/07)

1. I think the opening matchup between Hefty and Melvin could be closer than the league pundits are saying (currently Melvin is down 6-1 in voting). Bear Grylls' personnel face some tough defensive matchups, including LDT against the Bears, Lynch has the Broncos, and Carson Pa-Pa facing off with the Ravens. Although Melvin's WR corps lacks some SERIOUS punch (let's see what this supposed trade with Richard brings him), I like the McNabb matchup against Green Bay, the Jags D and Tony "My Wife Puts All Yours To Shame" Gonzalez. This one could come down to a Devin Hester punt retu-- ... yeah, scratch that.

2. I think that HBO's Hard Knocks has been fantastic. Major kudos to the network for making the 2007 Kansas City Chiefs appear to be remotely interesting/good, and for exposing the cursing genius of Gunther Cunningham. I wanna wear a pair of Gun's hunting glasses while watching the games each Sunday.

3. I think the discussion about Randy Moss and his fantasy impact this year is intriguing. Many of us believe Shawn reached to select Moss, but there is a valid argument that he'll produce a decent amount of TDs because of New England's play-action and having burner Donte Stallworth playing opposite him. Then again, Moss hasn't seen playing time this preseason. Whatever the side of the argument you're on, I think we're all in agreement that Slimmy's 10 TD prediction for Moss is stoner-rifically off base.

4. I think that Larry Craig has made me reevaluate all those times at Newark International Airport that I fiddled under the stall next to me. Honestly, I was just looking for my... boarding pass. Yes. Kudos to Melvin for the team name, by the way.

5. I think the opening weekend of college football could not have gone better. A convincing Penn State victory topped almost immediately by that thrilling App State win and the blowtorching of Notre Dame. Watching at the alumni bar in Tempe, about 35 PSU fans stuck around and just laughed following the Michigan game. And laughed. And laughed. Hey, at least UM can still count unemployed Dhani Jones as one of its distinguished alumni.