Grade the Trade: 9/27/07

Mike Walbert and Jon Hefty announce a 5 player trade. Bisbee will receive Marshawn Lynch and Jerry Porter, and will send Jerrious Norwood, Wes Welker, and Matt Schaub to Chicago.
Also, since I'm far too biased to properly write this segment of Grade the Trade, I now turn things over to our dearest and baldest friend, Mr. Jordan K Yingling.

GRADE THE TRADE: Look out people, the 4th trade of the season is on the table and it could be the highest profile trade ever, ever…
That’s right folks, the most valuable fantasy asset this league has seen since the Cardinals defense of ’03 is swapping squads. Matt Schaub could be just the spark needed to turn the Chicago Bear Grylls season around. Let’s hit the stat sheet and see what the Grylls gave up to land this fantasy gem and a few low profile players to boot.

Bisbee Ball Maulers receive:
Jerry Porter, OAK – WR
2007: 3 Gm, 4 Rec, 92 Yds, 59 Y/G, 23 Avg, 1 TD
2006: 4 Gm, 1 Rec, 19 Yds, 5 Y/G, 19 Avg, 1 TD
2005: 16 Gm, 76 Rec, 942 Yds, 31 Y/G, 12 Avg, 5 TD

Marshawn Lynch BUF – RB
2007: 3 Gm, 57 Att, 228 Yds, 76 Y/G, 4.0 Avg, 2 TD

MY TAKE - MAULERS: Marshawn Lynch has shown that he has some solid talent and that he may pan out to be a solid NFL running back. He’s managed to gain a respectable 4.0 yrds per carry and has found paydirt twice already this season. Even more impressive he’s shown this skill against Denver, Pittsburgh, and New England. Unfortunately for him, he plays on the Bills. Buffalo boosts the most unproductive offensive unit in football, producing an average of 8 pts/game thus far. I’m not saying they’re the worst team in football, I’m just saying that they’re not better than any team any of you might think is the worst team in football. More importantly with games against BALT, NYJ, CIN, MIA, and NE upcoming none of these numbers should increase anytime soon.
Jerry Porter? Let’s just say that when I saw a clip of him scoring a touchdown last week I honestly thought I was watching a 2004 Oakland Raiders season recap. I honestly thought Art Shell had barred from the league for life. I know analysts are saying this guy is poised to have a big 2007, but personally I’d rather go skinny dipping with my Grandma than have him, or any other Raider for that matter, on my team.

Chicago Bear Grylls receive:
Jerious Norwood, ATL – RB
2007: 3 Gm, 20 Att, 95 Yds, 32 Y/G, 4.8 Avg, 0 TD
2006: 14 Gm, 99 Att, 633 Yds, 45 Y/G, 6.4 Avg, 2 TD

Wes Welker, NE – WR
2007: 3 Gm, 20 Rec, 221 Yds, 74 Y/G, 11 Avg, 1 TD
2006: 16 Gm, 67 Rec, 687 Yds, 43 Y/G, 10 Avg, 1 TD
2005: 16 Gm, 29 Rec, 434 Yds, 27 Y/G, 15 Avg, 0 TD

Matt Schaub, HOU – QB
2007: 3 Gm, 100 QBRat, 76 Cmp%, 688 Yds, 4 TD, 3 Int
2006: 16 Gm, 71 QBRat, 67 Cmp%, 208 Yds, 1 TD, 2 Int
2005: 16 Gm, 98 QBRat, 52 Cmp%, 495 Yds, 4 TD, 0 Int

MY TAKE - GRYLLS: I’m not going to beat around the bush here… cause that would be disgusting, but Jerious Norwood is an absolute animal. I know he’s not a number one Running Back on his team, but neither should Warrick Dunn be. He’s shown glimpses of genius throughout last year and a few times already this year. I give the Falcons 1 – 2 more games before they realize they’re wasting their time starting Warrick Dunn every game and not giving this young talent the reps he needs to break out in this league. Unlike with Lynch and the Bills, Norwood and the Falcons should have some serious opportunities to put up some yards in the next few games as they face HOU, TENN, NYG, and NO. In limited action this season he’s averaging 4.8 yrds /rush, given the opportunity he could get back to his impressive 6.4 yrds /rush average from last season.
Wes Welker… do we really need to say more than he’s a receiver for the Patriots? No, not really… but what the hell. Tom Brady has shown a solid connection with Welker thus far and with the way the Patriots are playing right now this has no reason to change. Add to this the fact that the Patriots cheat regularly and Welker’s consistent performance should continue throughout the year.
Okay, Matt Schaub is mediocre at best and should consistently sit on the Grylls’ bench. He’s got years of experience sittin the bench so this really shouldn’t be a change for him.


OVERALL: All in all, I got to give a slight nod to the Chicago Bear Grylls with this trade. Yes, I’m mainly basing this on the fact that I’m 100% sure Jerry Porter will break the league rules on substance abuse before the end of the season (I’m talking about weed. Just look at him, he loves it.) With the injury to Deuce McAllister, Marshawn Lynch gives the Maulers a starting running back to immediately patch up a thin fantasy RB lineup.
For the Grylls, the addition of a skilled wideout playing for the most productive offensive unit in the game right now should immediately bolster an already solid fantasy WR corps. Add to that the upside that comes with Norwood and the opportunity to unload the Sex Canon that comes with Schaub and you got yourself a fantasy trade victory. THE END.

Oh yeah, I forgot to talk about what Jerry Porter adds to the Maulers. Ummmmm, besides a reason to watch Raiders games… A headache? No, the answer is nothing. He brings nothing. He’s a terd. THE END.